Atlanta, GA. my birthplace and the beginning of a story of how I can learn from others no matter the color. I guess I write this piece as a journal of what has been transpiring the last few days in different parts of the country. It is a journaling piece that rides the coat tail of a long, long historical undertone of the fabric of humanity.
As I write this the words that pop into my head are, “can we all just get along!” I wish it were that simple. But in order for that statement to be remotely true, it takes bravery, humility and courage to be a person to want that to be so. I learned this lesson not form birth but over time. My awesome parents wanted me and my brothers to see the country and be exposed to different types of people and to be good with being in different environments.
I grew up after leaving Atlanta as a young boy seeking to connect with others no matter where we landed. And, this friction as a young boy is one that allows me today to see the diversity in humanity and to also be open to learn form others. You see learning from others builds who you are and grows you personally , emotionally and spiritually. Being a man of color (African American, Black) and on the lighter side, I was treated differently on both sides of the fence, white or black be it racism or colorism.
If I could just for a moment give you what I know , this world could be a beter place. Placing yourself in the shoes of others same color or not, you glean so much of their story. And the powerful thing about humanity is that every person has a story. How that got to this point in time and possibly why thy think hat they think. If you work to learn from others you drop your assumptions and you seek to undrstand them. Listen, I said understand them not necessarily agree with them, there is a difference.
I would love to hear your story, and learn what patterns are working or not working in your life. Because, this is how I grow and this how we grow together. Taking our eyes off ourselves for just a moment, will bring so much hope and joy to this world.
To those that may read this and say I don’t want to learn from other colors, then I must say that same attitude is what will perpetuate the division and chaos we see today for other generations to come. Also, I am not nieve that the world will be perfect, because with humans there will always be imperfections, greed, evil and ego. But, if enough of us no matter the color stand up to learn from others we can work to build a better place period.
Blessings on this day,
Someone once told me that the purpose of storms is nature’s way of getting rid all of the dead wood and unhealthy limbs from plants, bushes and trees so that they can continue to grow. So what about the storm you are in now?
We are either going into a storm, in a storm or coming out of a storm- unknown
Life is really a journey of choices, battles, victories, pain, and success that we all have the priveledge to participate in. I recall as a young man coming out of college seeking new life and career that someone once told me life is fair Milton. It took me a while to really understand that phrase, but I get it now as I see it. Life isn’t about what you deserve, it is not fair, it really doesn’t care what you do with this temporary life you and I have, it really isn’t fair at all.
Life will give you exactly what you put into it.
I was totally relieved at some level that what I give to this beautiful life everyday is exactly the measure I will receive from it period. I also relaized that I could not point the finger to anyone but myself. If I want that Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson body, I will have to put the discipline and effort into it period. You can name what you want out of life, and if it hasn’t manifestd just yet, doesn’t mean life isnt fair. It simply means you haven’t put in the needed work, effort or time into yet. And think about this, what is the rush anyway? Life is a journey that we only end once they lay us in the ground.
So, have patience and be the person you really want to be in the storms of the now. You can definitely control two things in life and these two things only. Because all else is out of your control. The two things are your attitude (perception, thoughts and outlook) of life, and the next weighted just the same as you are suspended between the two, your effort (planning, action, follow through)
Let this encourage you today, you will weather this storm of now by placing your anchor in the things you can control and if you are like me you know who holds the future. :-)
Blessings on your journey,
Our lives are full of unknowns, from the day we are born into this world it all becomes a journey. And that journey becomes exciting when you are able to understand and receive a creator that wants to be with you throughout your unknowns of life. All you can do from that day on is be in the moment period. COVID-19 is presented much unknowns of what to do now, what is going to happen , how do I do life today? These questions are presented with doubt and at times frustration.
Can I share that COVID-19 is not just happening to us, but it is happening for us.
There is much that w can glean and learn during this time. This time will not return and in the midst of this pandemic we are given wonderful opportunities. There are opportunities all around us if you choose to see them and choose to take hold of them. You might ask what opportunities? Well, with every challenge the opposite is opportuntiy, look at the life of a child. The labor pains of birth present the glorious opportunity of life. Look at the business that were birth out of the recession, depression, or even civil war.
When I got married in 2000 to a beautiful woman, I was not exactly sure how these last twenty years would go. Just a series of “Unknowns!” These last 20 years have been wonderful and yes the best is yet to come, but I sit here thinking about all the things we have gone through and its been a journey of unknowns.
When I had my children and married two young girls along with my wife there was and is a series of unknowns, and I also think back and am grateful for all the unknowns. For me there is only one certainty, I will die.
Where do we get the idea that we are in control of anything? When do you feel the most anxiety? I am certain it is when you don’t have control and don’t quite know what the future state will be. Here is my remedy to be ok with the unknown, be in the moment.
Being in the moment is not saying there is no such thing as trouble or obstacles or COVID-19, it is acknowledging those things but at the same time it is having great peace in the day. Do what is right in front of you, love what is right in front of you, breathe in the air that is right around you. Tomorrow has enough trouble of it’s own, live and be in this day.
Do what you can and let the rest go!
I hope this encourages you today, especially during this unknown time in our world. When we get passed COVID- 19, there will be something else in our lives or world that will want to push us into fear and being anxious of the unknowns. Listen Maximizers, “Be In The Moment!”
Affectionately Your Coach-Milton
Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.- Albert Einstein
Social distancing doesnt mean you can connect in a manner that creates value. To share quick story on value, pulling up in a fast food drive thru- (don’t hate me those that can’t stand it, bear with me). The last time I went through a drive thru I was asked after ordering a sandwich if I wanted to make that a value meal? I quickly said no, because all I wanted was a sandwich and a water (counting calories here).
But the question stuck with me for a bit, because I have changed my outlook on food and working to become more healthy fit and extend my quality of life. So to me at this point in life this value meal is not value, because of what happens in my body after consuming a large fry and a large drink with the sandwich. I am not condemning , just pointing out my life.
So, the value add concept , what does it come down to in our personal lives and how do we bring it, give it, handle it. This word “Value” will be an ever increasing topic but allow me to share some points on how to right now increase the value we seek.
There is so much you and I can do add and increase our value, it will take more thought and effort, but the opportunity is there.
Listening is a great place to start: Listen to those in your relationships, Ask questions beyond task orientation, Make being with you, like no other experience. People are struggling and some are thriving and either way we should be listening to them and not to be an answer just allow them to breathe and get out what’s the feeling on the inside.
Consistency never get’s old: Be consistent with everyone in relation to you, or no matter how much others can give you. Even after the Pandemic begins to clear or or we have better direction stick with being consistent.
Build good relationships : People do business and build long term relationships with those they know, like or trust. Relationship will most likely trump trials and troubles, keep the relationship tight. Go deeper with your current positive relationship. Ask more insightful questions of others.
Personal Growth and Development: Learn your skills and talents and master your craft. Teach others what you know, with being quarentined this time we will never get back, find time in your day to learn by reading, listening, writing etc.
Applied Knowledge is power.
Take advantage of this time in 2020 and increase your value and adding value to others today.
Maximize the Moment- Coach Milton
Nothing is impossible, the word itself is “I’m Possible” Audrey Hepburn
The America dream is to pursue what’s possible by overcoming the impossible. Have you ever been in awe of the one who overcame obstacles and attained what was to you as being impossible?
Allow this as an opportunity to overcome your mental block or ceiling. Each of us was born what abilities, hint towards a marvel comic or movie. But seriously we are all gifted , and all gifts are different even though they seem the same. The variable is you and your uniqueness.
Because of this ability, you were made to overcome someone else’s impossibility and to attain what’s your possibilities. Let me say it another way. You were made for what you will , have and pursuing to accomplish. So there is no impossible for you, and all left is “I am possible “
When you stand in your success, you give inspiration and permission for others to stand in their possibilities and success. I am fully confident that you are great and greatness lives in the inside of you.
When you stand for what is right, you stand to serve humanity. I remember making a stand to a bully when I was in 8th grade. My father taught me to turn the other cheek, but if they laid a hand on you , please respond in kind. I stood up against this bully buy giving him chances to stop, because I wasn’t the only person he was bullying. At this particular time , enough was enough as I heard the last word I could hear from him. I made a slow roasting quick decision to end the abuse and I attacked him, skipping straight to the hands on approach. I didn’t know what I was capable of, all I know is I had enough and others did too.
Looking back at that time, I stood against another to serve humanity. It showed post the fight as I was congratulated and thanked for taking a stand. Here is an acronym for STAND I want you to never forget:
S. Send a Message to Opposition
T. Teach others to be their best
A. Ally with the kindest of Humanity
N. Notice the change in and around you
D. Drive darkness back for light to shine
Let this encourage you today to live in your possibilities and allow the courage to flow to others as an inspiration.
Blessings Coach Milton
Here is my secret that I’ve adopted the last couple of years and its the work around of the need to get it all done now, I call them phases. Now, this is a serious response to the anxiety and anger I would feel because I didn’t get it done.
I did some self reflection of why this would trigger me and I realized as I looked back over my life especially playing at a high level of football and joining a fraternity, that getting it done no matter what was a I have to do it.
Have you ever felt like, if I start it I had better finish it now? I know there are many others that deal with accomplishment anxiety or the need to see it all the way through. When I was in college and I finished my last year of college football I noticed a number of players that had finished their last game also drop out of college. See, I saw this to me as why would you get this far and not finish what you started?
I am a firm believer of finishing what you started, but even after all these years later maybe it was just phase one for many of them. I need you to understand that in order to uncover this secret to maximizing the moment you need to let go of having to get it done to enjoying the process. Can I share an acronym for the word PHASE that will change your life? Well, if you want to or not here you go:
A- Ask yourself for grace
S- Stopping is ok
E-Enjoy every step
Patience is the mark of wisdom, it isn’t something that comes easily but understood over time.
Honesty is the mark of a humble person, maybe it won’t get done right now or it won’t be perfect the first time.
Ask yourself for grace, there needs to be a level of forgiving yourself for allowing whatever it is to go over time.
Stopping is like saying you know I have run out of steam or ideas and it’s ok to start.
Enjoyment is the victory of life, your joy is something you must hold on to no matter what.
Maximizer take these keys and not only tackle the next project but keep your moments maximized with phases of them.
Blessings Coach Milton
I want to talk to you today about Forgiveness. Oh, a word that’s kind of just throws you off a little bit. Forgiveness, You are like, no that is really a soft type of word, talking about having a great life, but it’s an uncommon key.
Why is it uncommon? Because there are so many of us, people or human beings walk around living a life un-maximized because we haven’t found forgiveness for certain situations or certain people. Now imagine this, living a great life and having your life maximized by truly implementing forgiveness.
No one talks to you about why forgiveness is so important but I am going to share a really personal story of mine. When I was seven years old, I dealt with childhood abuse over the course of a year. When you are seven years old, you are so young, you are so impressionable and really the trust in older people was broken. And that abuse that happened really put me in the life tail spin where I was trying to figure out why, for what reason, what did I do?
As I grew up, that feeling of lack of forgiveness and confusion came up with me. And I am just trying to understand it, trying to wrap my head around it and figure it out, you know what’s going on here? And that ended up putting me into emotional spin where I was feeling angry. I didn’t trust a lot of people. I felt a lack of confidence in myself, I was co-dependent because I didn’t really know how to really make it in life. And it grew up with me. That anger, that bitterness took a root in my heart and it robbed me, robbed me of a lot of things that I could have experienced a lot differently in life. And that’s what I want to do for you, I want to challenge you to break free. Find forgiveness. Use this key to have a great life.
Key benefits to forgiveness:
Renewed Focus- Shifting your focus on what has happened , to what could be.
Refreshed mindset- a fresh mindset is a wining mindset, the path to success.
Rejuvenated relationships-we need healthy relationships to have success no matter the area.
You know forgiveness is for you. It’s not for the other person — it’s for you. When I’ve come to the point where I was able to forgive, that gentlemen, that young man at that time in his life — that was when my life took off and exploded. Good things started happening to me. I started to create new relationships, find new opportunities and increase my income. My marriage got a whole lot better. There was a lot of things that I had to deal with when it all came down to forgiveness — forgiveness was the answer for me. It was something that released me to having a great life and living my purpose. So forgiveness, it’s for you!
Blessings Coach Milton
I published this podcast at the beginning of the year and it is now April. We are in the midst of a pandemic but the principles don’t change. We have to gather ourselves and write a better tomorrow. Yes, we have some valleys still to go through but we can not be subject to the chaos around us and drown. Having a better vision for tomorrow is our secret weapon, outside of prayer for those that believe.
Use this amazing gift to be in a tomorrow only you envision, let this vision be of hope, joy, the best version of you and the world around you. Please enjoy and share your vision for tomorrow so others can be encouraged.
Blessings on your journey, I am with you-
We are in interesting times today, just recently we as a country are battling the COVID-19 epidemic which is a current pandemic. Our lives have changed from now on, never will our nation or world be the same. Because this fact exist it does give people anxiety, depression, fear, doubt and uncertainty. The biggest issue is that it deals with our identity. So the question is more glaring , “Who am I?”
This question deals with identity. The average human being has never answered the question, who am I? This is not what you do or did. Most people don’t know who they are, so they die as someone else. This is a great time in history to get serious about who you are, because what was is no longer.
I recall living a life that I thought I wanted, I eventually found out how unsettled and unclear I was. The reason for this imbalance of emotion stemmed from that I really didn’t know who I was. I realized that I was living the life of someone else. I borrowed an identity that wasn’t mine only because I hadn’t spent the time or invested the time to fully be aware of my strengths, talents and calling. You see there are so many days left for us on this earth and we can pretend we have it together either to impress others, or we are too lazy to figure it out on our own.
You have been given a great gift called life on earth and you were born at the perfect time. You are alive at the best possible time in the history of the world. Allow me to throw you another fastball, you are one of a kind. Your DNA will never be reproduced in this lifetime or the next, you are unique and special in more ways than one.
So here is my challenge if you can except that you are unique then can I challenge you to find out and be aware of who you are. What gets you going? What wakes you up internally and externally? What could you see your self doing often and not think about time, food or money? What is your oxygen?
These questions are a starting point that only you can answer and it may take time, so be gracious with yourself, ask those you trust around you to give you some candid feedback to help you be aware of your strengths and also weaknesses.
I want to encourage you give more to your cause first than to someone else’s cause. And if you find out that your identity is wrapped up in someone else’s , break free ASAP. Above all this will allow you to give out of your purest self.
Blessings Coach Milton
This idea of creating a dynamic team comes from Joe Namath or “Broadway Joe.” I had a chance to ask him about his playing days as the Super bowl III winning Quarterback for the New York Jets. And one comment he made about his playing days with the Jets was not his fame or winning, but that a “team will make you or break you!”
How important is it to have the right people on your side either as supporters or drivers as coaches or teammates. Andrew Carnegie knew the importance of the right people around you and it was engraved on his tomb stone, “Here lies a man who knew how to enlist the service of better men than himself.”
Creating a dynamic team is an investment of daily and weekly deposits. You must invest in the right relationships because people will follow you anywhere, if they know you, like you and trust you. The right people also will have an understanding of the vision and in essence take partial ownership of that vision as well.
Motivating the right people to action is not necessary because they have caught on to the vision themselves.
Organizations spend millions of dollars each year in motivation their employees, simply because the team isn’t dynamic or the vision hasn’t been casted in a way that draws them and compels them to move forward with you or without you.
Next, designing a plan that assures success could be the most difficult and rewarding for Big Thinkers and World Changers. I currently sit on the board of 3 NPO’s or non-profit organizations and the one thing that is almost vital after the first two points is a well crafted plan to succeed. “If you fail to plan, then you are planning to fail.”
Planning is a nightmare to the creative person’s mind because it deals with details and to those that are creative, death is in details. I speak from the perspective of a creative mind and know without detailing a plan I most assuredly set myself up for failure. There are those of you, who do not only love details but live for details, I applaud you! You who are hungry for details are my best friends, because it’s you who give a free spirited minded person, hope!
There are many tips and types of ways to plan. I won’t elaborate, but I will give you a suggestion. Do what feels comfortable to you. If it is to write out a five year plan, scratch some notes on a napkin, use your cell phone or tablet to keep records, write on a white board your notes or goals. Use whatever method you like. The important thing to understand is that you need to plan — plan some ideas, some goals, some time with a significant other, a vacation, a budget, a direction for a career or plan your life. I just want to tell you to have a plan whether big or small.
My personal favorite is to plan the next day the night before and then before I sleep envision my day and how it will go. Something amazing happens as I do that; no longer am I guessing what to do that day. I can move forward with confidence. And also be flexible. Yes, be flexible with your plans and with your life.
I pray this blesses you today-
Milton is genuine, persistent, and sincere. There are very few things that detract Milton from his pursuit of what he believes in. His attitude is fantastic and professionalism top notch. -
International speaker, creator of Maximizing Moments with Milton and the Author of Your Purpose, Your App -How to Stop Drifting and Start Living.