Having Control Issues?
You don’t have to be in the driver’s seat trying to control the direction of everything. This doesn’t mean we should sit back and do nothing. It just means trusting our inner wisdom to guide us from moment to moment. Don’t create a life where you need a lot of detailed plans, check lists, and to-do lists.
We try to imagine everything that we’ll do. How everything will play out. How to solve all our problems at once. But it’s impossible. We have to take it one moment at a time. And things often turn out differently than we imagined.
Focus on What You Can Control, Leave What You Can’t
“Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.” — Steve Maraboli
Knowing the difference between the things we can control and the things we can’t is a topic that comes up frequently, both in my own self-reflection and in conversations with others too. It manifests in many contexts and situations but always comes back to a single principles:
We can control our input, but we can’t control the outcome
I can control how I show up in my relationships but I can’t control what other people think of me. I can control how much time and effort I put into preparing for goals, but I can’t control when it shows up in my life. I can control how diligently I work to lose weight to be fit, but I can’t control of the timing and where the fat comes off of.
In all of these situations, we can influence the outcome, but we can’t control it.
This was a huge learning curve for me when my wife was pregant after our first miscarriage. There are certain things most, if not all, pregnant people and couples worry about: miscarriage, birth complications, the baby’s health, whether baby is early or late and so on. These are the big things. They are also the things that, ultimately, I can’t control. I can influence them, but I don’t get a final say on how they turn out and worrying about them doesn’t change this.
After spending weeks obsessing over every twinge and ache my wife would have, I made a decision: to focus purely on the things I have control over and to accept that, for everything else, just let it be. I discovered that, while I didn’t have control over many of the big things, there was a laundry list of smaller things I did have control over: how I loved my wife, how I kept attention on my other children, making sure my wife got to her appointments and would be as stress free as possible plus so much more. Does this mean I was completely worry free? No, but that worry was tapered by reminding myself to refocus on how I can make a difference, rather than spending precious time and energy worrying about all the areas in which I can’t.
I pray this helps you on your journey in life and remember to maximize the moments.
My Truth About Life
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This is my truth, I have one life to live , one day at a time. A portion of my journey is that I have survived a few near death experiences and a traumatic childhood incident. I am grateful for this day and grateful for this life I have to live because I can happily say it’s my life to live and I live it for the day I pass over into eternity. I am really surprised at the amount of people that walk thru life as short as it is depressed, bored, lifeless.
I completely understand having trials in life that lead to depression, what I don’t get is a life lived of boredom. I tell my children, whenever I hear, “I’m bored” I tell then truth then you must be boring. ? we as humans are the most creative beings walking on planet earth and we are full of creativity at every turn.
You don’t have to accept my truth that everyday above ground is a good day and that I live being reminded that after I pass from this life eternity is waiting, that’s why I pursue my passion and purpose to help others launch their dreams and bring hope where there seems to be none.
How To Have More Hope For The Future
What is optimism?
Optimism is a hopeful, positive outlook on the future, yourself, and the world around you. It is a key part of resilience the inner strength that helps you get through tough times.
By definition, optimism helps you see, feel, and think positively. But it has extra benefits you might not know about—optimism helps keep up your physical health too.
You don't have to be a "born optimist" to use the power of optimism. In daily life, or when faced with a crisis, you can choose a positive viewpoint to make the most of what life brings your way.
Can you make optimism work for you?
Even if you tend to focus on the negative side of things, "realistic optimism" can work for you.
With realistic optimism, you don't just expect the best and hope that things will go well. Nor do you let yourself see and expect only the worst. Instead, you look at the "big picture," the good and the bad. You then:
· Decide what is realistic to expect.
· Decide what you can do to make things go as well as possible.
· Choose to focus on the positives, and on your strengths, as you go forward.
For example, let's say you are about to have a knee surgery. You can choose to be optimistic about your recovery, rather than let fear or hopelessness take hold. Imagine how you want to feel 6 or 12 months after surgery—strong and active. Picture what you want to be doing, how you want to be moving around. Keep these positive, hopeful pictures in your mind.
A positive attitude can also help you keep up a positive mood, which can help with healing. But optimism alone is only part of a good recovery. It's also important to know what to do, such as physical therapy exercises, and what to be careful about. And if you need support or advice, you can plan ahead with the right people before the surgery.
When practicing optimism, remember to keep a flexible frame of mind. Expect change, and be ready to adjust to it.
How can you practice optimism?
Whenever you're having trouble with thinking negative thoughts, expecting the worst, or feeling powerless, try any of these exercises for a few days.
· Focus on what's going well.
Write down three things that have gone well in the past day. These can be large, like getting a raise, or small, like "I talked with an old friend today." Describe the cause of each event, and credit yourself for the part you played in it, such as "I made that phone call I've been putting off for a long time."
· Practice Gratitude. Write down three things in your life that you are grateful for. This kind of focus on what enriches your life can help keep your thoughts and feelings more positive.
· Look for the benefits.
Think of a negative event from your near or distant past. Write it down. Now think of something positive that has or could come of it. Write it down. For the positive thought, use larger handwriting or a favorite color.
· Look ahead.
Picture yourself doing something that feels good. Expect good things to happen.
· Build yourself up.
When you need it, lean on others or your faith to build more strength. Say to yourself often, "I am strong."
Blessings Coach Milton
The Positives Of Purpose
Having a purpose is not mandatory it is considered necessary to the fulfillment of life. Each one of us reading this today or in the future will have to leave this life through the doorstep of death. At the end of life is a joyous or burdensome feeling you will get. I believe the feeling is determined by the knowledge of living a life well. Wellness of life will not come down to possessions, it won’t come down to money, it will come down to being on purpose in your dealings with others loved or strangers. A life well lived comes from a purpose pursued every day.
These 5 Positives of Purpose
The positives of Purpose:
A purpose will motivate you.
A purpose will keep your priorities straight.
A purpose will develop your potential.
A purpose will give you power to live in the present.
A purpose will help you evaluate your progress.
Maximizer let this be blessing to you today. As I write this, I write this on purpose and intention to see you maximize any given moment in your life towards success.
Blessings Coach Milton
Milton is genuine, persistent, and sincere. There are very few things that detract Milton from his pursuit of what he believes in. His attitude is fantastic and professionalism top notch. -
International speaker, creator of Maximizing Moments with Milton and the Author of Your Purpose, Your App -How to Stop Drifting and Start Living.