“You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway.” ~Steve Maraboli I’ve noticed that things go much more smoothly when I give up control — when I allow them to happen instead of making them happen. Unfortunately, I’m terrible at this. Although I’m much better than I used to be, I’m a bit of a control freak, at some level we all are. I often use perfectly good energy trying to plan, predict, and prevent things that I cannot possibly plan, predict, or prevent. For example, I wonder or worry if my son is going to get enough nutrition and rest during his high school years and sports or will I be liked by my peers at work, or will all the content I put out make a difference in someone’s life. Like most humans I know, I spend a lot of time in business that’s not mine. The son’s business, my wife’s business, Mother Nature’s business, other people’s business. As a forever recovering control personality, there are three things I know for sure about trying to control things: As a forever recovering control personality, there are three things I know for sure about trying to control things: 1. We try to control things because of what we think will happen if we don’t. In other words, control is rooted in fear. 2. Control is also a result of being attached to a specific outcome—an outcome we’re sure is best for us, as if we always know what’s best. When we trust that we’re okay no matter what circumstances come our way, we don’t need to micro-manage the God. We let go. And we open ourselves to all sorts of wonderful possibilities that aren’t there when we’re attached to one “right” path. 3. The energy of surrender accomplishes much more than the energy of control. I suspect it’s slightly different for everyone, but here’s what control mode looks and feels like for me: My vision gets very narrow and focused, my breath is shallow, adrenaline is pumping and my heart rate increases. My mind shifts from topic to topic and from past to future very quickly, and I have little concentration, poor memory, and almost no present-moment awareness. And, I am all about maximizing the moment. In surrender mode, I’m calm, peaceful. Breathing deeply, present in the moment. I see clearly and my vision extends out around me, allowing me to (literally) see the bigger picture. So the great irony is that attempting to control things actually feels less in control. When I’m micro-managing and obsessing over details, I know I’m in my own way. The Art of Surrender Surrender literally means to stop fighting. Stop fighting with yourself. Stop fighting the universe and the natural flow of things. Stop resisting and pushing against reality. Surrender = Complete acceptance of what is + Faith that all is well, even without my input. It’s not about inaction. It’s about taking action from that place of surrender. Sometimes it’s as easy as noticing that you’re in control mode and choosing to let go—consciously and deliberately shifting into surrender energy mode. I hope this helps you on your journey today, Blessings -Coach Milton Lately, I have been distracted a bit with scrolling time on social media with current state of affairs and on other things that it has started to really make me think. There are so many distractions in life, what can I do to change that?
Have you ever been getting so distracted by so many different things that it has caused you to waste a huge amount of time, and therefore, you have not been able to live in the moment like you would really like to. We constantly have something on my mind, and I feel like we are not always enjoying the fun moments. This is because we always are thinking about other things and distracting ourselves with everything that happens in life. Here is my go to when it comes to being in the moment. I think about loved ones I have lost period. They no longer have the moments we currently have. I don’t mean to be morbid, I just realize as I age that life is short and each day is important. Another thing is deep breaths always bring a focus to the minute and moment. Let me speak on gratitude as well, as it is a link to the journey you could be experiencing those moments in life and most are really magical and impactful. Bring your full attention to your breathe, bring full attention to life in your body, bring attention to the gratefulness that bounds and then you will experience life in the moment. Hoping this releases you to enjoy this moment and this day. Coach Milton Recently because of the work from home scenario for many people internet and WIFI has been a big deal. So big , that many people are subcribing to better internet if they can afford it. Or , many are using their smart phones as hotspots to tap into. Now, this blog isn’t about internet technology or WIFI comparisons or prices comparisons. Although any blog on those topics would be beneficial, it does lead me to a point.
There is much to learn and gather wisdom from all around us. Have you ever sat in a park or in an airport and looked around? Some consider it people watching , others consider it observations. I call a time God has presented to me to learn , gather and process new information. Which brings me back to my initial opening statement and title. Wiring is a huge part of how effective your transmission of communications is. Just look at the improvements of cell phone coverage now up to 5G. The same works with the wiring effectiveness of your home or residence. I live in a 20 year old home, old to some and new to many. But, my family and I have never owned a land line, only cell phones. Now is this new age of technology and the having o work form home more, I needed to upgrade my internet service. And, after some time with the service I am noticing some of the deficiencies with have an all WIFI home. Number one all the devices that pull form the main modem and router, it isn’t enough. So, now I am working to figure out how to turn my phone jacks in each room into ethernet ports for different devices. In my research I found out that there are different wirings for different purposes. A phone line and chord may contain a pair of wires, but many houses in the walls will carry up to four different wires. And the wires in the walls for phone connections are braided with four different colors and white wires. The reason for the braid of four different wires is so that the transmission of signal or communication doesn't get mixed up or lost. The other interesting thing is that the braided wires are not in all the same direction in order to reduce any signal confusion. This new found understanding and wisdom blew my mind, why do I say that? In our lives I believe we have certain wiring for certain areas of our lives. At times, there can be two wires touching each other which needed to be braided in a different direction. You will know when signals get crossed by the confusion it cases you and others in your close relationships with or work and business. It sounds and feels like you are saying one thing and doing another. You will place more value on one thing over the other, which can cause pain and suffering for a short term gain. Each wiring needs to be color coded and braided in opposite directions of your life, so you can have clear communication, clarity of purpose for each part of your life and wholeness full of joy. Allow your family have its own wires, allow your business or profession to have it’s own, your finances it’s own, your health its own. Give time to each one and if one needs to be focused on more than the others, make sure you set proper boundaries and protect the other wires the best you can. if you don’t you will experience a short circuit, and loss of communication which will lead to frustration and anger. I hope this encourages you today as I was encouraged to think about this. Blessings Coach Milton Prepare for the worst, expect the best and then take what comes-
Maybe you feel stuck. Or bored. Or frustrated. It’s not that you don’t like the life you live, it’s just that you suspect there’s something more. Some greater sense of meaning or excitement. New connections. New adventures. New possibilities. The truth is those possibilities are always within your reach. You may not be able to quit your job or develop new skills by osmosis, but every day contains within it countless opportunities, all dictated by the choices you make. Some of those choices may seem inconsequential when you face them. They’re the little things, after all. Why not do it how you usually do? Why not stay in your comfort zone when it’s just so comfortable there? Do it for the possibility. The possibility that if you make one minor change you may set the stage for major fulfillment and thus maximize the moment. Sometimes even the smallest shift in thinking or doing can create the biggest opportunity. Here’s a list of 10 first steps on how to get started: Step Out From Your Head 1. Challenge your beliefs about what you can and can’t do. 2. Challenge your ideas about how things should work. 3. Have a vision session 4. Look for opportunities in a tough situation. 5. Remove something from your life that doesn’t serve you 6. Commit to something you always say you’ll do but always fail to start 7. Turn your focus from something you don’t want to something you do want. 8. Replace negative thoughts with positive ones 9. Identify the blocks that keep you from breaking a bad habit. 10. Forgive someone if you’ve been holding a grudge. I am forever an ally to your purpose and potential, please allow me if needed to support you one on one for your journey, Blessings today, Coach Milton www.miltonherring.com |
Milton is genuine, persistent, and sincere. There are very few things that detract Milton from his pursuit of what he believes in. His attitude is fantastic and professionalism top notch. - AuthorInternational speaker, creator of Maximizing Moments with Milton and the Author of Your Purpose, Your App -How to Stop Drifting and Start Living. Archives
December 2022
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