One thing I thought much about as a child was being a fighter pilot, call it “Top Gun” influence , or call it father was in military and being a pilot was something that intrigued me. But when you are a child you are mesmerized by certain things and have you ever asked the question of why that mesmerized you or what that meant to you at such and early age? The reason I didn’t pursue this dream and vision was because I had one person, just one person tell me I would be to fat to fly. There was a weight and height limit to being pilot. This wasnt from a credible source, just from a person that I looked up to and thought knew more than me. Didn’t help that it played on my insecurities because I was overweight for a kid. A “Childhood passion squashed.” Shaking my head today as a grown man. Don’t let me get on the topic of those that hold you back because of comments that aren’t true!
“To Fat to Fly”
I think back now at what gave me the desire to be a fighter pilot:
It was dangerous
It was about saving or helping others
It was about being the one that others saw as a hero
It allowed me to vanquish the enemy of those I care about
It allowed me to see the world, or at least country
I had a position of significance
I could pass on my knowledge to other fighter pilots
I wanted to see others fly as well.
I recommend looking at your childhood passions to get a good gauge of what your purpose is, or atleast walk you in that direction. What you can find by looking back and not living there is why you are wired the way you are wired. Purpose demands you to enjoy, and be passionate about your calling. Your calling is pictured like a voice in the wilderness, there is fog in the air and you can hear it faintly but not sure of where it’s truly coming from , but you know its there. As scary or fearful it could be, to take steps in the darkness towards that voice of desperation, you have to trust me that there is a clearing of sun , birds, view that can’t really be imagined.
My encouragement is that you do walk your walk and your walk alone. Not alone to where you don’t have drivers and supporters, but walk and run in your lane.
Around 9 years old I was at the edge of the bank of a lake, I vaugley remember fishing that day, but if I caught something it would have been memorable. What I do remember is that standing at the edge and looking down, there was a small pole on land and a rope with fish hanging just below the murky water. Well, I took one wrong step and slipped into the water, now I didnt know if the fish were alive or sharks existed in that murky water. If you were there you would have seen live the first boy to walk on water and not ever want to go into a lake again till he was older. There wasn’t any visibility in that water from where I was standing, and even in a pool something always looks like jaws swimming in the deep part of the pool.
I say all of this to bring up the topic of clarity:
CLARITY- The state of being clear, easily seen
Just for a moment take a deep breathe and think the word clarity, matter of fact repeat the word over and over in your mind , then repeat the word audibly out loud. If you took this exercise seriously, you may have experienced a couple of things; calmness, peace, maybe solutions, even possibly some direction. What I am trying to to get you to do is take a moment and think. “Thinking for a change,” as John Maxwell so briliantly wrote.
This is where the struggle lies in our lives in our mind a battle rages, the noise or distractions that come against us and in us so regularly through out the day are deafening. Think about the noise from work, the noise from family, the noise from business, the noise from yourself. All of these things lead to a lack of clarity. Allow me to share a few key principles to help with clarity factor-
THE CLARITY FACTOR
e. Share with others
2. TRUTH- a sense of truth, authenticity, integrity in your life brings tremendous clarity. This looks like being a person of your word, doing what you say you will do, work to be yourself and not someone else, evaluate your dreams and make sure its truly what you want and not borrowing them from others. Betru to yourself , so you can be true to others.
A man with integrity , walks securely (clarity)
I’ll stop right here, even though there is more to share. If you can master these two key principles over the next 60 days. You will exprience the clarity factor.
Now, go and grow my friend-
Comfort zone myth-
This post is going to to the point and is going to open your thinking up to a greater possibility. That moment when I was 11 years old I saw the red and gold football team flash across my TV screen. It was the magic of the NFL and the San Francisco 49ers. Still am a fan today 30 years later.
I caught a vision and sensation , I too wanted to run on the field in the red and gold and play a warriors sport. This was my comfort zone, by definition :
noun: comfort zone; plural noun: comfort zones
My stress in my current life I was living was relieved because I caught a vision, I went deeper with envisioning myself being a professional athlete, making an impact on and off the field. Being looked up to and playing a sport I learned later , you could make a decent living doing.
You see it was a bubble that was created that I felt secure , confident and empowered in. It was my comfort zone. Now getting there was a different story.
My comfort zone was in my head and heart before I could realize in the physical dimension, every time I closed my eyes, got stressed, was disappointed this was my comfort zone. The struggle, the challenge, the learning came with the process, and I wish at the age of 22 I cherished more of that process ,just as I do today at 42.
This on the outside is a reverse in psychology and thinking, because I have been told what a comfort zone is, but was never told what a comfort zone is not. Until I analyzed it and look over my life , I have been working to get to my “comfort zone” all of my adult life. and its been the learning, growing, stretching part that is the obstacles that try and keep me from my zone, but in essence builds me up to take on more of my comfort zone.
This is my opinion and thoughts as I share with you, to rethink what you know, or just think for a change in life. Get to your comfort zone, because what you think is comfortable is a disguise of stress, discomfort and or depression.
Thanks for your attention -Coach Milton
9 Good Reasons You Need to Live Your purpose
Love my mother , she never needed a good reason to discipline me and my younger siblings , just “A Reason” is all she needed. Being born in the south, we (brothers and I were disciplined with a firm hand, comb, belt) if needed. And I am grateful as I am older for the discipline , that was handed to me over time. But this post isn’t about my butt whoopin’ moments.
This post is about giving you some key principles and pointers to get you moving towards a better you. The you that needs to build, live and pursue purpose in life.
Here I am outlining 9 Good Reasons to Live Your Purpose-
verb (Action word)- Imagine as a future possibility; visualize.
Athletes do it before the big game. Soldiers do it before stepping onto the battlefield. Visionary business leaders do it every day.
When we envision ourselves reaching goals of any kind, our brain starts finding ways to make it happen.
In no way do I mean to sound boastful, but in middle school I envisioned playing football in front of thousands of people and making my way to the NFL. I did play college football in front of thousands of people and I was invited to the NFL combine.
As a an older teenager I envisioned being married to woman that had all qualities I was looking for physically, mentally, emotionally. I have now been married to that beautiful woman for nearly 18 years.
In middle school I envisioned traveling the country and working and helping others, I can now say that I get to travel the country often and experience new people and cultures and get to help others.
Envisioning a better life isn't going to be perfect, there have been many mistakes and failures along the way.
Whether your goals are related to business, health and fitness, family, hobbies or anything else, having a very detailed mental picture of the ultimate win is imperative for success. I borrowed this mini-guide to making this work for your life if so you choose:
Select and prioritize your goals. Most of us have many goals we would like to achieve during various stages of our lives. Some are realized, and some are not. That's life. Prioritization and focus is critical for achieving goals.
Any business book will tell you not to have ten top goals each year. At most you want to have three or four major initiatives. Spreading yourself or your organization thin won't lead to success.
Gain and develop a mental picture. Develop a mental picture of what the win looks like and be able to articulate it well. If your goals is to compete in a spartan race, envision your training regimen. Envision yourself performing during the event. Envision what you want the outcome to be.
The best athletes in the world are experts at this.
If the goal is to build your company into the best place to work in your area, what does that look like? Who will be on the team? What will the culture feel like? What will competitors say about you? Develop the mental picture.
Work hard and persevere. As much as we may all like to believe it, achieving lofty goals takes a ton of hard work and perseverance. Having a vision is just the first step.
Success can be defined in many ways. But successful people have not been handed more opportunities than the rest of us.
Hard work breeds opportunity. And then even more hard work is required to turn that opportunity into something great.
Have vision, work hard and never be out of the fight.
Who am I – This question deals with identity. The average human being has never answered the question, who am I? This is not what you do or did. Most people don’t know who they are, so they die as someone else.
I recall living a life that I thought I wanted, I eventually found out how unsettled and unclear I was. The reason for this imbalance of emotion stemmed from that I really didn't know who I was. I realized that I was living the life of someone else. I borrowed an identity that wasn't mine only because I hadn't spent the time or invested the time to fully be aware of my strengths, talents and calling. You see there are so many days left for us on this earth and we can pretend we have it together either to impress others, or we are too lazy to figure it out on our own.
You have been given a great gift called life on earth and you were born at the perfect time. You are alive at the best possible time in the history of the world. Allow me to throw you another fastball, you are one of a kind. Your DNA will never be reproduced in this lifetime or the next, you are unique and special in more ways than one.
So here is my challenge if you can except that you are unique then can I challenge you to find out and be aware of who you are. What gets you going? What wakes you up internally and externally? What could you see your self doing often and not think about time, food or money? What is your oxygen?
These questions are a starting point that only you can answer and it may take time, so be gracious with yourself, ask those you trust around you to give you some candid feedback to help you be aware of your strengths and also weaknesses.
I want to encourage you give more to your cause first than to someone else's cause. And if you find out that your identity is wrapped up in someone else's , break free ASAP.
The Myth of Monday’s
I used to treat a Monday with disgust and pain. Sunday afternoon was the time where the pit of my stomach became upset and nauseated. Have you ever heard the phrase:
“Sunday evening blues Monday morning blahs”That used to be my mindset and attitude until one day. One morning the sun showed through my hospital blinds and beamed on my face. I vividly recall this morning because the previous week’s were full of pain, uncertainty , doubt about my health and life. I was literally hanging in the balance of life and death for a couple of months.
I had received a knee surgery that ended up causing me to have a staph infection in my knee that lead to the other parts of my body. Rapid weight loss and an emergency surgery to remove the infected ligament after it sat in my body for two months. Lots of specialist and experimental drug treatment and a stroke to the right side of my body, I knew I was done for.
But then and since I am a man of prayer and Faith I would say , “But God!”. There was a different path and purpose for my life that 20 years later I stand here becoming healthier than ever , raised and raising children, married for 17 years and so much more.
This is the part where I hope you see that my perspective on Mondays changed drastically. It’s amazing how a life threatening incident can change your whole life and hopefully for many for good.
You may have or may not have experienced a life threatening situation, but you don’t have to to know that life is precious and a gift. To remind yourself that you are a gift to the world.
Let your Monday be a difference maker for your work or life week.
I have a cute niece that when she was between 1 and 2 would almost everyday put her gel shoes on the wrong feet. It was the most odd thing and no matter how much we would try to help her change and put the shoes on the right feet. It didn't matter to this cute little girl because , she was living her life the way she wanted to.
How can you or I maximize the moment and no matter what is normal or supposed to be correct , what if we just put our shoes on the wrong feet? What if we could explore new avenues, new ideas a sense of fresh creativity? And when others try and tell you to do it differently, we listen acknowledge and continue with our plan of being unique and having just plain simple fun.
There is a beautiful perspective that comes when you realize how much the world is made up of others unique like yourself who chose to put shoes on the wrong feet, and fought the path of the world. This is where enterprises and industries are built and foundations are laid.
Be different and play with your shoes on the wrong feet,
During any football game in which I specialized in for quite sometime, I've seen many players that carry the football or when chasing down a play or blocking for the next touchdown, get thrown off. I mean you are focused on a course of action and "wham" someone knocks you off balance or throws you off course.
I sense that this happens to many people when just living life, it could be your marriage, your children, your health, your finances, you chose the topic. But, what do you do? Many people, not talking about you?! Some give up, some play the blame game, others throw in the towel, or some find the will to fight past the obstacle and refocus towards a greater goal.
One thing I can share with you, is that if you get thrown off course and I have experienced this times in my life don't get discouraged. I believe the being thrown off course can be a positive if you see it that way. Think about this when you are thrown off course you have a chance to look round at what happened , it allows you to asses the situation and make a better choice. But here is the kicker, you can not wait or wallow in your current state often. Quickly ask the question , "what do I need to learn and where do I go from here?" Good questions call upon good responses.
Allow me to encourage you and be resilient in your dealings , especially when things seem rosy and now there is a strong smell of ashes. Be the Phoenix and rise out of the ashes to greatness.
Milton is genuine, persistent, and sincere. There are very few things that detract Milton from his pursuit of what he believes in. His attitude is fantastic and professionalism top notch. -
International speaker, creator of Maximizing Moments with Milton and the Author of Your Purpose, Your App -How to Stop Drifting and Start Living.